Tuesday, March 26, 2013

Seven days to go.

They say the older you get the more you know yourself, the more comfortable you feel in your own skin. 
I have seven days left ‘in my twenties’ so naturally I've been thinking about all the feelings you are supposed to feel when approaching a milestone birthday. 
And I'm hitting a big, blank wall.
I don’t know what I am supposed to feel.
I only know it's a significant birthday (Aren’t they all? Having a birthday literally means Eat Some Cake You Didn’t Die This Year!), with a zero on the end of it, and I am supposed to know myself better now than I ever have before. 

So I decided to think about the things I know rather than the things I don’t as I approach the elusive 30... 



I know that glitter is quite the polarizing thing. You love it or hate it. 
I happen to be the former. 

I know that my hair is curly. Despite all those years of my mom saying I love your curls and me wielding a Chi straightening iron in protest, my hair is messy and wild and curly and I couldn’t be happier about it. Moms really do know best. 

I know that a broken heart can feel like the very end of you, but that time really does heal. Also: Krispy Kreme crullers and the very best girlfriends and Patty Griffin blasting through the speakers like whoa.

I know that plaid flannel shirts make me happy. Me and Kurt Cobain and every hipster in Brooklyn.

I know that it is possible to call two places home. One is wide open space and small town living and known. And the other bright and bustling and magnetic.
My Alabama and my New York. Home.

I know that it takes four hours for a nose piercing to close and that asking your then-boyfriend-now-husband to re-pierce it will not end well. For you or your nose.

I know that dusk is my favorite time of day, partly because it’s magic, but mostly because Justin loves it so.

I know that a yucca- when sliced thin & cooked in coconut oil- tastes awfully like a potato chip and yet remains a root vegetable. That and much more thanks to completing the whole30 challenge.

I know that I am a coffee snob and that Bodum should pay me for all the French presses I’ve sold.

Old Crowe Medicine Show and Fun. on repeat. A friend has been calling this the Dirty Thirty playlist and I feel great about it. Thirty should definitely have its own playlist.

I know that living states away from family is hard. Whoever invented Skype & FaceTime, thank you.

I know the best place in Manhattan for a black & white cookie. Come visit. I will take you there posthaste.

I know that marriage is simultaneously the hardest and best thing I have ever done. And worth it. So very worth it.

I know that blogging introduced me to a community of incredibly talented women who became some of my dearest friends and although I haven’t been as diligent a blogger these last months, they remain women who inspire me, women I love greatly.

A red vintage t-shirt boasting the words Alabama Spirit Team and well-worn Levi’s with a tare in the knee. I’m flushed just thinking about it. I know that’s what Justin Rigoloso wore the day I fell in love with him.

I know that approaching 30 is a new sparkly dress and red lipstick and calling your pal to say, Want to take some pictures of me? I’m turning 30 and it feels like a big deal.



Lastly, I know that we each have this one wild and precious life.
I do not want to waste one minute thinking I should have accomplished more by now or why hasn’t this happened or why did that happen.
Instead, I want to live this life well, to be marked by a love for people rather than things, to be so consumed by the grace & kindness shown to me that it overflows and spills out to all those around me.

I have seven more days to be 29.
And then, I am going to put on a party dress, stain my lips red, pump up the jams and eat some cake.
And Lord willing and the creek don’t rise, I will turn 30.

That’s what I know.

21 comments:

  1. This may be my favorite post of yours ever. You just have one of the best hearts of anyone I've (n)ever met, Molly. And with that, the "Lastly..." paragraph is golden. I want to keep that thought with me forever.

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  2. This is so beautiful!
    They say 30 is the new 20 :)!

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  3. woooohooooooooo! partay!!

    love what you said about a broken heart. very much resonated with me.

    you also used the word posthaste. make you one of the most awesome almost-thirty-year-olds i know.

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  4. ugh I am just so happy to be your friend, you are truly one of the most beautiful people I know. I wish like nothing else that I was there to celebrate with you, take you out for a margarita (weather be damned) and talk about what we DO know about life, instead of what we don't. I love you.

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  5. Ahhh, girl. Pave the way for me...I'm right behind you! Love the way you think about aging. So graceful. And to add...

    ...I know that despite not seeing or talking to some of your friends as often as you'd like, a true friend like you is always that.

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  6. Wonderful post! And the perfect perspective. I've made a pact with myself to stop moaning about getting older and instead celebrating that fact - maybe with some glitter :)

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  7. Birthday twin! Our time is approaching. We will use all the glitter, allowing the haters to hate.

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  8. This is amazing. The one about Justin's outfit when you fell in love- my heart stopped.

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  9. WHOOHOO!!!

    appropriate shoes! I need to find me some for next year...

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  10. I love this post...every birthday is such a blessing :)

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  11. This is such a great I'm-almost-30 post! I also love glitter (my husband does not) and anything from Krispy Kreme can help cure the most broken of hearts. I hope you have a wonderful birthday!!!

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  12. love this post! hope I can write a similar one next year! ahhh :)

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  13. this is hands down my favorite blog post i've ever read in my whole life. perfect. i hope you have a fabulous birthday in your party dress! you'll love 30! xoxo

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  14. So thankful you were born and for the part of your 30 years I have known you! God bless the 3 C's time (even though one technically starts with a k. It makes the same sound and you get to make your own rules in instances such as those :) XOXO

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  15. This is amazing, and you are amazing. Happy almost-birthday, Molly!

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  16. Yes... ditto the other comments. This is my favorite post of yours this far. Love you friend and happy-almost-friggin-thirtieth-birthday. They're not that bad.

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  17. happy, happy birthday. to a lovely lady.

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good communication is as stimulating as black coffee,

and just as hard to sleep after.

anne morrow lindbergh